I recently had a sophomore check, which is basically an interview with a few of the Worship Arts professors to see if I can stay in the program, and it was so good for me. I've realized that I haven't found out who I am. My identity was in people, not Jesus. I realized that the only way to find an identity is through seeking Jesus. Because I'm such a relational person, it has caused me to be so sensitive, and I think that is what has caused my feelings of worthlessness. These next two weeks I'm going to focus on seeking Jesus, and through that, I'm going to focus on me, and who I am through Christ. I'm so ready.
I leave for Wellspring in 2 weeks. Pray for me, and the team please.
Stephen Clark.One of the greatest men I've ever met. Though not very close physically, in spirit we are. This kid knows more about me than most people, and there was 0% judgment from him. Though I've only seen him the last two years here, I've seen him grow a whole lot, and it was an honor watching him all the way up to his recital and final stage directing performance. It was an honor serving with him in JP, and the little bit of time he was involved in Phantom. It's been fantastic going through acting for film with him, and it has been truly an honor being his man lover for some time. I will miss him so much!!, But I know the Lord has a plan for him and he is going to go on and do great things. I love you Stephen!-Marc
There is someone I know wh
o deserves a little bit more than a blog, but here goes nothing. Kyle Rehnlund has been my roommate all year, and can I just say, that it has been incredible. Kyle is a loving, passionate, servant and I've seen him grow so much. It's been cool sharing my journey this year with him. We had a rough patch (okay, a couple rough patches) but through it our friendship has grown stronger and stronger and stronger, and the bond between us is solid as a rock. Nothing can break it. I'm so excited for next year because we both have to be intentional with our relationship because we aren't living together, and I think it's going to be an important thing for our friendship.
I think what I love the most is watching Kyle do what he loves to do. He is so passionate about serving the Lord through worship. Not only in chapel, or corporate worship, but through choir, and through section leading, and even through private lessons. I can't wait to someday visit his classroom and watch him do his magic because he is following a calling set forth for him, and is loving every second of it. It's going to be fun being with Kyle through this college journey, and I'm so excited for whats ahead.
Thanks Kyle, for a great year, great support, great listening, and for sleeping on top of my the whole year. while making silly sucking noises in your sleep. I love you a whole lot.
-Marc
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Time for a life update.
Wellspring is in Tminus 3 weeks, and I am ecstatic. I cannot describe to you how excited I am to travel with the people I'm going to travel with. I AM SO EXCITED. I love Jake and his incredible leadership, Eric and his maturity and quiet sense of humor, Jacob with his sarcasm and genuine spirit, Luke and his humor and honesty, Marrissa and her heart (that says it all), Carolyn and her on fire passion, and Liz with her crazy personality. I think this summer is going to change our lives.
Friday wraps up my Sophomore year of college. It's been a rocky one to say the least, but it's been fantastic. Being a PA was one of the best things I have ever done. Seriously, they may not know it, and I wish they would know it, but I love my students so much and what they bring to the core group, and to the university. I am so honored to have them in my core, and I'm sad to see some of them go, but realize Spring Arbor may not be the place for them, so it is exciting for me to see them fulfilling their callings.
I've gotten to know so many new people, and have build strong friendships with so many I knew before. I've mentioned a lot of them in this blog, but I am honored to have met so many new amazing people that I'm going to get to spend my time here with. I've also met a ton of new people at home which makes it a lot better when I'm in Lansing.
I've gotten into the theater and music stuff a lot more this year, and have loved every minute of what I have been blessed to be a part in. Johnny Pye was phenomenal and the directing shows were too. I've loved them both.
God is stirring something up in my soul. I don't know what it is yet, but I know it has a lot to do with the lack of time I spend with Him. He is going to turn my world upside down soon. I can sense it. I'm excited for it!
Thats the lowdown.
everyone who reads this is a champion in my eyes. I would love for you to comment, so I know! It's excited for me to know people are interested in what I have to say.
I love you all.
My emotions, feelings, thoughts about secular things seem to have taken over. I care too much what people think, and I'm certainly too critical of myself because of it. The feeling of worthlessness that pops up in my brain every once in awhile needs to be redirected to unworthiness of the love our Savior gives. The pain I feel from rejection needs to be taken away, washed away by the blood of Jesus.but for some reason it's too hard.I create the illusion to myself that what people think about me is important. I think to myself that things people do to me matter. I'm constantly trying to please people.All in all, what I'm saying is I need to be pleasing for Jesus, and all those things come into place. This sense of worthlessness that creeps up on me all the time needs to be completely redirected and washed away. This pain in my stomach from people constantly unintentionally hurting me needs to turn into confidence to confront the issues.Conclusion: Pray more. Read more. Act more. Worship more.how?Discipline more.how?more accountability.where?everywhere.when? from tomorrow on. :)Goodnight.
